If your best friend after nine years was about to walk out of your life, would you fight for them? I’m curious because I told my best friend just that and we haven’t spoken since, which makes me think that it’s just not a big deal to her.
Long story short, I have always been there for her when she needed me but not the opposite. During the hardest time in her life I was by her side but when I was having a rough time she was nowhere. The only way that our plans work out is if I go to her. She would tell me she would come visit, the day before she was supposed to arrive she would say how excited she was….and then never show, and I had no heads up.
We were supposed to go to a concert together a few months ago and she decided she couldn’t come because she didn’t have the money. Totally understandable however, the next week she flew to California to visit her girlfriend. I think a $35 concert is much cheaper than a plane ticket to Cali…. So now she is living in California with her new girlfriend and I’m happy that she’s happy but, if you were moving across the country you would tell your best friend wouldn’t you?
Am I overreacting or is it time to just let it go. Right now, I’m thinking the latter…
bookmarkchronicles 
To me, it sounds like that relationship is one sided. You are trying to be her friend, while she is really just doing her own thing. I know it’s hard but sometimes you just have to let people go. I know from my own personal experience that people drift apart, and sometimes it’s harder to keep fighting to keep that friendship than it is to hold on to it, but it’s better for your emotions and your wellbeing to just let it go. If she was your true friend, she would actually care.
I’ve had this happen to me several times in my life, and I tell you what, now that I know who my “true” friends are, I am much happier, and I know that I have people around me who really care for me and who really love me no matter what.
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yea at this point I feel like im wasting my time. I just wanted to make sure that I wasnt overreacting
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You aren’t, it’s hard when you want to be friends with someone and they don’t seem to care. You are worth more than all that, so screw her! lol sorry, I just think life is too short to read bad books and have bad friends. I hope you will be okay!
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Thank you so much and that is the greatest advice I’ve ever heard lol
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The reason she’s not bothered is simple – she was never your best friend I’m afraid. Sorry….
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I think she was at one point. but that fell a part when we no longer lived within 5 minutes of each other
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I understand , but it hurts I’m sure…
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It does. But better to end it sooner than later I guess
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Yeah, i hope you find someone to fill the bf gap in your life ☺
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I agree… I think that maybe it’s time to let go, it does seem like a one-sided relationship and those are not healthy at all 😦
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I think you’re right. I just feel like those 9 years were a huge waste…
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don’t think of it like that. You probably had experiences and grew in a way that wouldn’t have happened otherwise. We sometimes outgrow friendships, it’s the natural course of life, unfortunately.
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Friendships change, just as people do. Were the 9 years a waste? I don’t think so. I had two best friends of 7+ years that I ended the friendship with two or three years ago. I don’t regret being their friend nor the memories we have, but I also don’t necessarily regret going our separate ways. I guess what I’m trying to say is if you are tired and don’t want to fight, just let it evolve naturally. And I wish you the best of luck, because it will be rough.
(As a side note, I also have a friend who walked out of my life that we eventually mended and have a different relationship now. You just never know. <3)
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Thank you! It’s not that I’m tired of fighting, I’m tired of being the only one that’s trying
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I don’t believe you’re overreacting. You’ve tried to hold onto something that you believed was important to you. Your friend didn’t seem to see it the same way. Time is precious and if your friend doesn’t manage to spend the slightest amount of it with you, while you have tried to numerous times, I believe it’s time for you to move on and find true friendship elsewhere. Keep your head up and smile. Some day you’ll find someone who see’s your company as something really precious. See the good and bad adventures with this once-friend as a learning experience for your life! Take care. 😉
– Lashaan
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Thank you!! 🙂 After thinking it over, I’m definitely ready to move on
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I don’t think you are overreacting at all! Friendship is a two way street, It’s not only about her and her feeling. If your feelings don’t matter to her, then it’s not a friendship worth having. I’m glad you are ready to move on, I’ve had a few friends in my life that have been the same way and trust me, you’ll feel better when you don’t have to deal with all of their crap all the time. 🙂 Keep your head up!
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Thank you so much! I appreciate it 🙂
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I agree with everyone that you’re not overreacting. And I agree that friendships evolve. Because I just went through friendship where I’ve been there all the time. And when we had conflict. Just a minor disagreement on group work and they completely went crazy on me. And instead of talking about it they ignored me like we were never friends. Until I was needed to solve a problem. Now, I’ve realized that they were using me, instead of being my friend. And I’m glad all this happened, because it taught me that who she is is not what I want in a friend.
I’ve had friendships where we all went our separate ways and at some point in life we come back. Friendships where we all we all realized our friendship was not going to work. And we were honest about. Her friendship and her plus friend, was the first friendship were I was used. The most important lesson I learnt from that is that some people are supposed to leave but it’s our inability to let go that ends hurting us. Because for me there were signs that I just overlooked.
So I guess what I’m saying it’s not your fault. You did your best, and that’s all that matters. Treasure the memories. And best of all, you’ve grown. 🙂
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Thank you! At this point, I’ve just stopped talking to her completely. I gave her one more chance to fight for our friendship and she chose not to take it.
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