Rae’s Rules to Remember #53: Why safe spaces are important

So, I got into a debate with someone this week about safe spaces because someone posted a video about how they need to be gotten rid off.

In the video, this guys is congratulating the University of Chicago on taking a stance against safe spaces.

The video is hosted by J.D. Durkin. Don’t know who he is and don’t really care to learn anything more about him. One of the first things that the says is “Oh poor baby. You don’t want to be challenged by somebody who thinks differently than you do? Shut the fuck up and grow a pair”

Already off to a bad start.

The quote from the university stated:

“Our commitment to academic freedom means…we do not cancel invited speakers because their topic might prove controversial and we do not condone the creation of “safe spaces” where individuals can retreat from ideas and perspectives at odds with their own”

I have nothing against controversy for the most part. However, if a university is funding something racist/sexist/homophobic/xenophobic/Islamaphobic or something else along those lines with a purpose that is not to educate students, then it is inappropriate. Also, as far as when it’s okay to retreat (and yes, sometimes it is okay) it depends on the who and the why. For example, if an LGBTQIA+ or Asian student is having slurs and other offensive things yelled at them (both of with have happened at my university) then they deserve to have a place to go and someone to talk to about it.

Some of the other things said in the video include:

Something about “bullshit” safe spaces being created for “people who are overly sensitive”

  • Oh! Because I’m supposed to not feel anything when someone directs a racial slur at me and my friends, let alone react.

Then he makes fun of another school who offered counseling to students who felt uncomfortable because of the Republican National Convention being held near the campus

  • Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone needed counseling when the Republican presidential nominee is sexist, racist, xenophobic and Islamophobic. He’s a fucking bigot. He makes fun of people with disabilities, showers hatred and ridiculous stereotypes on Latinos and Hispanics and his followers have been videotaped yelling horrible things at minorities

“If you are a college student, or anyone for that matter, life ain’t about making your pansy ass comfortable. Higher education should be about encouraging freedom of thought, speech, and expression.

  • Tell that to the majority. At the end of the day, they are the ones that make minorities need safe spaces

“To all new students…..suck it up….learn how to toughen up and stop running way with your microaggression nonsense”

  • Maybe since you’re a straight white man, Mr. J.D. whatever, you may not have ever been microaggressed against, experienced systematic oppression or felt uncomfortable on a campus full of bigots because many of them look like you, but microaggressions are real. Your denial of that only proves that you are a part of the problem.

So someone posted that video and I commented and of course then some random person jumped in and tried to tell me that I was wrong. Here’s how that conversation went (I’m blue, the other girl is purple):

I disagree with this. Safe spaces aren’t about being afraid of people who think differently from you it’s for underrepresented and minoritized students to have a space that, literally, feels safes when the rest of campus is unwelcoming and full of bigots. The people that don’t need safe spaces are in the majority (as per usual)

Good. Welcome to the real world kids…. Safe spaces only allow for more separation and resentment of another group and their ideals which further isolates their own beliefs, the people, and rewards that space in between rather than face a challenge head on and see eye to eye….Coddling ADULTS that are being given resources to bring themselves into the real world and shape that as they may is dangerous and a false concept of how society functions. A person strong enough in their convictions does not need a literal space to retreat to but the humility to understand another person and resolve the difference…

I get what you’re saying but being strong in your convictions doesn’t mean that when a classmate or a professor says something racist/sexist/xenophobic etc that they won’t get upset by it. Sometimes you need a resource who isn’t going to dismiss the situation like it’s not a big deal because in most cases that’s what happens and it actually is a big deal. The problem isn’t that safe spaces exist it’s that the campus climate isn’t welcoming to minority students. And regardless of the space itself, everyone is welcome including majority students

Again that is literally creating a divide. A space does not solve what is within ones own self. Definitely issues can arise that are directed and presented inappropriately whatever the topic but such is life and that is a reflection of the individual, the work is then to take how one is feeling about that issue and channeling it into their work and purpose. Having safe spaces also sets one up to believe they are underrepresented to begin with and they act as such so a bias is present on both ends. Society could not be more divided today so for that to trickle down into schools only allows people to move forward in their lives with that anger and assumption of being different and ‘other’. It negates any hope for solution and mending

So when students are attacked by their professors ans classmates they are just supposed to accept it cause its “the real world?” Spaces aren’t causing the divide. Its already there which is why people create those places. Its not up to minorities to have to constantly educate everyone else. Even if they do people choose not to listen because they don’t care about experiences that they’ve never had or think “don’t apply” to them. Its not a belief that a group is underrepresented, it’s a fact. Something that is felt and seen when walking across campus and sitting in a classroom.

What I do know about life and people across the board is you are solely responsible for yourself in terms of what you think/feel/and do. If you feel strongly about something then pursue that passion, if it is ARGUED that is not DEMEANING that is fuel to channel and strengthen what you may or may not believe. A safe space gives the false hope and resentment of anyone opposing another’s way of thinking. That’s not to say there are not people who cross a line but the true victory is overcoming whatever that bias may be and moving forward with ones education and support of their own beliefs. A professor or any one person does not speak for how a mass of people feel despite what is being spread today- so to have a space and assume incorrectly what that person is dispelling is fueling hatred and disdain and a place to attack back rather than have clarity

I have so many issues with this conversation and the way that she dismissed this issue. Firstly, as a white woman you DO NOT have a right to tell me that I can’t have or don’t need a safe space on campus. As a member of the majority you do not get to tell the minority what they do or do not need. If you are white, you do not get to tell people of color what they do and do not need. If you are cis and straight you do not get to dictate to the LGBTQIA+ community what they do and do not need. If you are a man you don’t get to tell women what they do and do not need. And so on and so forth. You don’t get to decide whether or not my feelings and experiences are valid. Flip the script and the same rules apply.

I spent four years at a predominately white institution. If I hadn’t gotten so involved in the Office of Multicultural Life (OML)  and had a resource to help me through my experience I would have transferred. Not because I was “sensitive” or afraid of people with different opinions (if you know me at all then you know that I welcome different opinions) but because the campus climate is not welcoming to minority students of any kind. The fact that the campus – from the administration to the students – was so closed minded and shut down to diversity is the reason that the OML became a safe space, the reason that we needed it. As I said before, the safe space was a result of the campus climate, not the cause.

What most people fail to realize is that safe spaces, regardless of the designated group, are open to anyone. The problem is, the majority are afraid to step out of their “comfort zone” and be surround by black people or gay people, and the possibility that they may be the minority in the room for a short amount of time despite the fact that we deal with this every single day.

And how exactly do you think safe spaces work? That we just go there and talk about how much we hate people in the majority for being closed minded? NO. We figure how to break down the barriers, plan campus wide events for the education of others, we let people know that this safe space exists and that members of the majority are more than welcome. The problem is that nine times out of ten they don’t fucking care. They don’t want to get involved because they’re too stuck in their own ways and beliefs to even consider listening to something different.

So if you think that safe spaces aren’t needed, get your head out of your ass and look around. Watch the news. You can see the way that minorities are horribly treated every fucking day. This is the world we live in, but heaven forbid we have a place where we can actually talk about our problems and worries without being dismissed by people who “can’t relate.”

I am not speaking on behalf of everyone and sure some minorities may not feel this way, but I can definitely say that if the campus was anything like mine, most of them do.




About Bookmark Chronicles

Hi! I'm Rae. 26 Book Blogger. Booktuber. Gryffinclaw. Coffee & Tea Lover.
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19 Responses to Rae’s Rules to Remember #53: Why safe spaces are important

  1. I agree with what you’re saying about safe spaces

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Gee, who would even want to go to this campus after that? I also think it’s ironic in both the University and the DJ remarks about “Freedom” and yet want to shut down the Freedom of those who need a safe space? Do you think they see the irony of that at all? You can have all the freedom you want, as long as you do it our way? If I was a student there I would honestly think about leaving.
    Or if they are so dead set against having a safe space, they could at least do some research into safe spaces. There is nothing academic about shutting something down because you don’t agree with it, THAT is no debate, there is nothing to learn from that. Or they could get out there, in the real world and see what it’s really like. That’s one of the problems with people who are “higher up” who get to make the decisions of how a campus is run. They have no actually clue what’s really going on in their own business.
    Don’t speak about “Freedom” when you are actually restricting it!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ariel Lynn says:

    That FB person made me want to punch my computer. That sounds expensive, which infuriates me even more.

    What a jerk. I could write off what J.D. Moronic said because he wasn’t communicating with someone who felt the need to have a safe space (something he wouldn’t have the need for unless he wanted to, oh, I don’t know, communicate with someone who has different opinions/experiences from his own), but that woman disregarded everything you said, only to post to you whatever she wanted to say.

    & what infuriates me even more is her ridiculous claim: “What I do know about life and people across the board is you are solely responsible for yourself in terms of what you think/feel/and do.” A person is absolutely responsible for what he/she does, but not what he/she thinks or feels. If someone says something cruel to me, I’m not responsible for feeling upset – it’s a human reaction. It sounds like she’s trying to write off people’s reactions to as someone else’s problem, relieving her of complete culpability. It’s also a brilliant way to make it alllll the minority groups’ problems when they’re treated like cr**.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. JustMe says:

    I’m so glad I stumbled across your article! I’ve googled all morning in an effort to better understand what, exactly, a safe-space is. Your explanation is the only one that made any kind of rational sense. Thank you!

    As a blessed step-mother of two teenagers (soon to be college-bound), the current atmosphere and rampant use of hate-speech concerns me greatly. I have literally made some of their “friends” leave my home, with a calm explanation as to what and why. I try to teach my children how much richer their lives will be with an open mind and an open heart.

    As such, I feel like my generation has failed your generation and I am deeply sorry. I don’t know what happened, why it happened, or even when it happened. All I know is that we are reaping what we have sown, and our children are paying the price.

    Back to topic. While it saddens me that they’re necessary, I’m thankful that safe-spaces have been created. It’s time for the “grown-ups” to pull their heads from the sand, to see the reality that you face every day. Only by acknowledging it, can it be changed.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you! I’m glad that you found this helpful! You certainly don’t need to apologize on behalf of your entire generation but hopefully my generation will be able to fix some of the problems that this society finds itself in now. Safe spaces are incredibly useful and I hope that more people finally start to realize why. Thank you again and good luck to both of your daughters!

      Liked by 1 person

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  6. Duckhomie says:

    Whining snowflakes. Reality has no safe space, hiding from the world won’t make it go away. Get a clue and get a life.


    • Get a clue? Coming from the person who obviously didn’t understand what the hell they just read. Really? It’s not about hiding. It’s about the fact that assholes like you live to torment people over shit you don’t understand because you’re so full of yourself.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Duckhomie says:

        You poor, aggrieved and put upon martyr. When you’re finished feeling sorry for yourself, try to get a life and do something constructive. Just look where all this race/gender hustling has gotten you.


      • First of all I don’t feel sorry for myself. And if you actually cared to learn anything about me you would know that I’ve done a lot of things that are constructive and talking about race and gender has gotten me pretty far. So before you start talking shit know what you’re talking about. Of course the chances of you actually taking the time to know what you’re talking about are slim so if you don’t like what I write and can’t have a conversation like an adult, stay off of my blog. Or I’ll just ignore you until you actually have something of value to say because I obviously have to be the bigger person in this situation because you’re too full of yourself.

        Liked by 1 person

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